Finally...The postman's letter has arrived...

I've received my orientation package a full three weeks later than the rest of my friends...I was very k.c. about the whole issue and even PERSONALLY made my way down to the Office Of Admissions ( in the far-flung galaxy of the Faculty of Engineering in Kent Ridge) to ask for my package...I was told to "go home and be patient" by a sudoku-obsessed office minion.

I ripped upon the package and eventually understood why I received it so ^&*%ing late...

I got a place in the Double Honours Programme! Woohoo!

As of today, I am a Business student as well...Law and Business...Sounds not bad right? haha...Well, there are certain pros and cons to this unexpected outcome...

Pros:

1) Most important pro is the chance to meet chio bus from Business fac...haha

2) And I get to eat the delish Yong Tau Foo@ The Deck when I go to the Kent Ridge Campus for my business modules...

3) 2-for-1 degrees! The best thing since Canadian 2-for-1 pizza started its 2-for-1 gimmick!

4) I get to slack in NUS for one more year when all my friends are struggling in the workforce...5 year programme what...

cons:

1) I get to slack in NUS for one more year when all my friends are earning money in the workforce...5 year programme what...

2) Life sucks when you have to shuttle back and forth between Kent Ridge and Bukit Timah campus for your lessons...

3) The modules are designed to drive even the most hardcore muggers crazy...That's why they chose only 25 out of 600 plus applicants for this programme...easier for them to cover up if all of us go mad...can u imagine a faculty with 600 mad people?! Bedlam in Bukit Timah!

4) I have to take some Math related electives...Maybe I should get Ah Tham to give me tuition as well...Hahaha!

Anyway, have you guys seen the latest NUS Business School ads on TV?
OMG...The one that I buay tahan the most is the one with the two ang mohs raving about NUS...* goosebumps* Come on lar, it's so so staged and fake lor! I mean, ok, we are all happy we got into NUS...but is there a need to get so high? The girl's *giggles* make me doubt her sanity...maybe they will find something wrong with her mind during the medical examination and kick her out...haha

I am being pestered incessantly by N.! This is very bad...I thought I shook her off when I gave her a fake hp no...but apparently I've been suffering from bad karma recently...She saw me at Amara shopping centre...and I was not quick enough to run away...Eventually, she got her claws on my real number because my skimpy attempts at evasion failed to shake her off...Some people just can't read the signs...I predict unwelcome visitations very soon...Maybe I was really at the wrong spot at the wrong time...maybe I should have just pretended to be mute when she came to talk to me at the bar that time...or at least deaf...Haiz...I don't mean to be rude...but she can't expect herself to be the core of my universe! Especially since I don't even know her well...

J. has been abrasive of late...PMS= Permanent Menstrual Stress? Work is taking a toll on her appearance and moods...I predict that she will grow old very fast and become even more volatile as time goes by...When I first got to know her, she was an Angel...Now that work is starting to pile up and deadlines are looming in the horizon, I am starting to catch a glimpse of a pair of horns and a permanent scowl...It's getting increasingly hard to talk to her and it's even harder to arrange to meet up...26 is too old for puberty and too young for menopause...I wonder what's eating her...maybe she just needs more time and space.

Met R. while clubbing last night...Asked her why she changed her hair colour from red to black ( Contrary to what she thinks, I am firmly of the opinion that we have no common topic AT ALL so I try to ensure that our conversations centre on the obvious and shallower topics:)

R: " Cuz I wanna be a gooooood gurl!" (fake, cute smile)

I nearly puked. But i must say that black makes her look less like the daughter of Ronald Macdonald...Really hoping that term starts at Curtin asap so I won't keep on bumping into her every time I hit the dance floor...we talked about some bo liao topics over a couple of drinks...I hate it when weird people like R. creep up behind me just when I am about to impress a pretty girl and then act like that they are damn chummy with me...It ruins all hopes of ever hooking up with Miss Right...

Saw H. too! OMG she was sooo hot!!!! How can a princess like her have a boyfriend who looks like a Chimpanzee and acts like a Bonobo!? Appalling manners, poor hygiene and licentiousness seem to be his main character traits...Looks like I will have to rescue the beautiful damsel in distress from the maw of the dragon! Muuahahahahaha... At least that's what his breath smells like...H. intro-ed me to her galpal Gina...who's not a bad person...kind, humble and gentle...great to talk to.

Packing up for my Beijing trip...going to the Great Wall Of China! Also taking a trip to The Forbidden City ( What exactly is forbidden there!?) and The Summer Palace...Going to taste Peking duck at Quanjude and go clubbing at Houhai!!!! Really excited...No money though...gotta raise more funds for the trip.

Well, better enjoy myself before school starts...somehow, I feel like Persephone...about to tdescend to the Underworld...Sigh...

Had a great night last night...

Met ken and the gang for dinner...Huixian came along too...quite a nice surprise lar...It was really great talking to her about Singapore's food scene...Nice to meet someone with similar tastes and preferences.

After dinner we went to Union because ken was so enthu to show off his salsa moves...Two of his gal pals drove down to watch him. One of them was quite chio...

Union was crowded because it was ladies night...Kept on bumping and grinding into people on the dance floor. Some fat, hairy and sweaty ang moh knocked into me when I was carrying my drink to our table...causing me to spill half of it...The lout did not even apologise to me, much less buy me another Martini...

I danced with a Singaporean actress. She has an elder sis who is also in the entertainment industry. This gal is most well known for her film debut, in which she locked lips with another pretty young thing. Incidentally, the film was a box-office disaster and was shoved out of the nomination list for a foreign film festival...because there was too much English in the script. I've been told that this film was full of pregnant silences (whatever a "pregnant silence" is), so I guess it is ironic that they rejected it because of the language in the dialogue.

Dancing with 26 ladies in one night is tiring, but I enjoyed the variety! For some strange reason, one of my partner's male friends called me Annabelle Chong...I seriously wonder if that was a compliment or a snide remark...

Most challenging one was Gen...who was 1.7+m tall...I had to arch my back and stand on my toes so she could clear my turns...I was giving her a broken smile throughout our dance...a combination of a grimace and a forced smile...One of my partners got her beats and turns all wrong...eventually, she gave up trying to dance salsa and just gyrated like a wild cat in heat...She wore a backless halter and a mini skirt that ended mid-thigh...Halfway through her gyrations she let down her hair...so every straight male within a 10 m radius was leering at the both of us ( or rather, her) ... There was a symphony of cat calls and wolf whistles...I was a bit disappointed that I could not elicit an equally enthu response from the ladies in the crowd...despite my slick Miami slides...hahaha...but I was the ultimate winner last night cos she came and asked me for my number! Natalie really made my day:)

Rhonda was there as well and I continued playing cat-and-mouse with her...I did not want to be ensnared in another "interrogation session"...I have also learnt to steer clear from some mature ladies who come down just to look for boy-toys...Union is full of these male lolitas...young-looking ( though not always as young as they look...) guys who are humorous, intelligent and know how to say things that please older women...I've got a bad rep because all kinds of women come to me to make friends, buy a drink or ask me to dance...i've even done mothers and daughters before! ( ok...this sounds darn wrong, forget I said it...) Scratch under my veneer and you find a sloppy, messy, clumsy and easily jealous boy who is insecure and indecisive...This proves the old adage " do not judge a book by its cover" correct.

" It's great to be young...I love to listen to what you guys talk about...People my age talk about mortgages, stocks and *yucks*...making babies. All the time. Except when they are talking to their boss, then it's always about next month's sales figures."- Stefan

" Hanging out with you makes me feel young again. That's something I've not felt for a long time."- Val

" 21 is a great age. I wish I was 21 again."- Roy

Youth is so precious. Too many of us take it for granted and spend our lives without any aim or purpose. Before we know it, time flies by and we are old already...Life can be so fleeting and transient. Previously, I never taught much about what I wanted to do with my youth because many of my friends were just idling away and throwing time out of the window. Spending time with older people is a real wake up call...I have been spurred to treasure my youth and not let it go to waste...It is so ironic that all of us yearn to reach 25, and then desperately try to remain at that age forever.

The Zerolimits thingie is nearing completion...I am responsible for it, but I am still unclear about the details...In very broad terms, we provide webhosting, e banners, weekly coverage, editorial services and publicity...The team itself will engage its own website designer to create a graphic interface that can blend seamlessly into our pre-existing template. I'm really relieved that Stefan tied down the details with Adrian and Jezreel...saves me a world of trouble. Thanks man.

Finally got the payment from SPH for that micro-mini article I wrote a few months back...Wow...80 bucks...a princely sum for not much effort on my part...haha. Money matters are not exactly looking up...I have used one thousand bucks from my accountancy pay to fund my holiday to Beijing...which leaves me feeling quite poor.

Anyone wanna go to New Asia Bar or The Altivo? Please, please, please let me know! I also wanna check out J Bar...So if anybody feels thirsty...give me a buzz!

Had a great day.

Went to the beach with Brian and spent most of the day soaking up the sun and doing nothing....The weather was great for most of the day, except for light showers in the afternoon. Still, that did not dampen our mood...we reminisced about the bad, old days in SigCoy and realised that the bad, old days were actually not that bad...Oh, we had a great time talking about makan trends over char kway teow and ice kachang at the hawker centre!

Brian's a chef at the Swissotel, so naturally food is a topic close to his heart...It's hard to find chefs nowadays with passion and verve...quite a few of them are chain-smoking cynics with pendulous mood swings...

Had dinner with FJ at MFM...Paid cut-throat prices to eat lousy food. 'nuff said...Went to town to do guitar shopping after dinner...An absolute waste of time because neither of us had any intention of buying. Had fun playing with the drums though...must have caused a real stir at the staid music school...I was stopped by a lumbering store assistant who reminded me of a lycanthrope.

We went to meet Evelyn at 8.30 and took her to the Friday Fiesta. The club was super crowded and we had to share a table with a group of bawdy, rowdy zoo animals. They wanted to make friends with us, so we obliged. I admit that I did it rather reluctantly as I did not like the over-friendliness of that group. I guess they are nice people and stuff...but I just wanted to have the evening to myself and I did not appreciate the sudden intrusion into my privacy. Rhonda, a lady from that group with an OTT red hairdo, was especially over-friendly. I introduced myself as Jazz:) Haha...so for the rest of the night, I had a really poseur-ish name with a musical lilt...Our conversation went like this:

Rhonda: hAAAArrr-LLLLLooooW HaaaandZzommmme!!!! ("act cute" smile...utter grossness...)

Me: hi.

R.: What's your name?

Me: Jazz ( eyeing the cute Eurasian chick on the dance floor...)

R.: Doyoucomehereoftenhowoldareyouithinki'veseenyoubeforesomewhereyoulookreallyyoungareyoustillinschoolorsomething?

Me: Huh?

R.: I LLLuuuuRRVe your name!!! It's Sooooooo coooool!!!! ( bulging eyes)

Me: ok.

R. : Where do you stay? What do you do in your free time? What kind of woman turns you on?

Me: Dunno. ( I can't believe I am talking to this cartoon character...I think she works in the ISD)

And then I do something really stupid...

Me: I've seen you here before...I th-

R.: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! (OMG this woman can really pull her words) Then why didn't you approach me? (Gleaming pirhana smile) Next time if I see you here, I'll make sure I get your aTTenSSShUNN ( takes a long swig of MY drink) heeheehee (tries to cover her what she probably believes to be a coy and flirty smile...)

At this juncture, I spotted Lucille and Gen at the opposite table and rushed over to say hi...I spent the rest of the night struggling to avoid Rhonda...much like a naked mole rat trying to run from a hungry King Cobra...

I ran 20km in the last two days...finally got my groove back...all this time I've been lying around and slacking and growing fat...now it's time to start my marathon training again! Haha! yeah!

Going to Shima for Japanese food tommorrow...First time I'm going there after Goodwood Park's renovation...Everytime I'm there I am disgusted by the behaviour of the snotty tai-tais and their spoilt, pampered children...I always find the presence of their hollow-eyed maids quite disconcerting, especially when they stare at me eating food that they don't have the opportunity to eat...I will feel guilty and lose my appetite.

A really busy day today.

Had six hours of solid lessons...back-to-back...facing a menagerie of belligerent little faces..A raucous cacophony of screaming and shouting...chairs being painfully dragged against the floor...the air thick with flying accusations...flailing arms everywhere...this seems to be some kind of perverse, insane Madhatter's tea party...

I scream...As usual, nobody gives a damn.

Met my sis and her bf for late lunch at PS...To my utter horror, I found them mugging together on a date...This goes against all principles of nature...but then, love is impervious to principles of nature in the first place...maybe certain people like to spend time with their significant others scrutinising the Binomial theorem or some other obscure mathematical law...perhaps debating linear inequalities is their idea of a raunchy rendezvous? Who am I to disagree...

Spent the rest of the afternoon shopping with them....went to buy a Mother's Day gift...It's so hard to shop for my mum...she does not like anything in particular and dislikes most things in general....except stuff with garish, Obiang Cheena-pok motifs and designs...but she's my mum. And if she likes that, then that's the kind of stuff we will get. Mental images of hot pink lotus buds keep on popping up in my head.

Met Stefan in the evening. We went to meet the Zerolimits team...words flew back and forth in fast and furious volleys...I could not grasp the implications of our negotiations...so I just sat back and pretended to pay attention...occasionally doodling some crap on my note pad. Their programming knowledge is phenomenal whilst mine is close to zero...I struggle to pretend I understand, but sadly I can't. I try to chip in my two cents worth with the vague proclaimation that the "problem now lies in the layout"...I was swiftly corrected when some guy pointed out that it was "not the layout but the graphic interface." Argh...jargon and goobledygook...

How in the world did I get chosen to be in charge of this account when I know nuts about SQL, PHP, Webhosting, integrating blog engines and graphic design? At least I could understand them when they were discussing the sponsorship issues. That's something closer to my heart!

On my way to Jitterbugs, bumped into Sen...minutes later I bumped into Darrelle...and then Candy...So weird and coincidental! All three were very close to me in the past...but we drifted apart as time went by...hope to catch up for a cuppa soon.

Went clubbing with Desche and Valerie...lost myself in the surreal realm of incandescent lighting and pulsating music...Just love hanging out with the two of them...FJ did not come today...wonder why...perhaps Frankie was still feeling blue..haha. Oh, and Valerie should cover up because all the wolves around our table were staring at her and licking their chops...I was so disgusted. Not by her, of course.

I am convinced with each passing day that I was never meant to settle down in love. I was born to suffer uncertainty and insecurity. I was destined to endure entanglements and complications...but somewhere deep within, I hope that I can someday find a girl who will want me to love her simply and whole-heartedly...sans the painful mind games.

Actually, I've found such a person...but I really don't think I deserve her at all. Guess what? She isn't who all of you think she is...

I hate being teased and tempted...

I hate innuendo, subtle overtures and coy smiles...

I hate half-truths, intrigue and ambiguities...

I hate "if", "maybe" and "perhaps"...

I hate it when a heat wave follows a cold draught.

I hate naughty winks and the sly parting of lips when you give me whimsical answers.

I hate having to read your body language...to unravel the mysteries behind your feminine wiles.

I hate your stretches of pregnant silence and your sudden bursts of vacuous verbosity...
Rattling on and on and on in that smug "I-told-you-so" tone.

Or maybe it's just me being selfish and infantile...desperately searching for certainty when certainty was never meant to be mine...

A lazy weekend...

Went to Union for salsa...The dance floor was packed as usual...Union is not called "Home Of The Latin Beats" for nothing...haha. Most of my partners last night were very nice, except for a certain rude and uncouth Ah Lian who gave me very bad vibes...As she had been chainsmoking most of the night, her breath smelt like a dragon's...There was an Argentinean couple on the floor. The girl was an absolute princess but her pal looked like a pug. When I asked for a dance, the pug eye-balled me and whispered in a very hoarse voice( another chainsmoker), "she's already spoken for..." What a possesive, insecure and unfriendly old poke! For dramatic effect, he stroked her thigh and licked her ear( utter grossness!). The girl squirmed and went back to nurse her Gin and Tonic...I shrugged casually and subsequently shared the dance with a petite Chinese girl with a French Braid.

"Men always set themselves up for a fall..." Discuss.

This was one of the talking points during dinner with Mr. Tham. It's true you know...

Consider this: guys take girls to posh restaurants, buy expensive gifts and spend excessive amounts of time and effort obsessing over trivial details in the lives of "that special someone"... This creates hyper-inflated expectations and the girl starts to think that it is normal for the guy to express his love so lavishly. When they finally end up together, she gets a rude shock when her bf just can't (or is less willing) to meet her demands. The result is a relationship full of stress and tension.

I resolve never to set myself up for a fall ever again. I've done it so many times and the result has always been overwhelming pressure and anxiety. In future, I'll make sure that our relationship is built on the cornerstones of honesty, trust and openness...I will let you know what to expect if you decide to be with me. I will not pretend to be someone I am not. I will not hide under a veneer of epicurean sophistication. I will be caring throughout our relationship, and not just during the courting period.

*Haiz* it sounds so simple...but we all know how easy it is to slip into the image of someone we are not (at least for me..)

On another note, the food at Botak Jones is really great. Think Southern Comfort with the flavours of the Singaporean Heartland-Unpretentious and satisfying grub. Thick, Paprika-spiced fries that are crispy on the outside and fluffy inside... moist, tender Cajun chicken that gets more flavourful with every bite! The burgers are too-die-for as well. In many fast food chains, a burger is a synthetic mass of glutens and some unsavoury pig/chicken/cow parts (eg snouts, ass and ears). If you are REALLY lucky, you can taste what animal you are eating. On most occasions however, the burger in your styrofoam container is usually a factory-produced disc that is dry, hard and tastes of animal fat. Here, the burgers are fist-sized mounds of REAL MEAT! I suspect that breadcrumbs is incorporated into the delicious blend of minced beef, egg yolk and spices (usual homemade burger ingredients). This is because the burger does not disintegrate into incoherent bits even after being cut with a steak knife...

Met FJ for a drink recently...Frankie had a story to tell...He recently got re-acquainted with a gal pal from his uni days. Over the course of a few months, they dated and things seemed to be heading in the right direction. She was sending out good vibes, but FJ did not want to rush things. He remained his usual cool cucumber self...

Until the day disaster struck and she came to meet him on a date...with a new bf in tow.

Apparently, she felt she was not getting younger and was tired of waiting. The other guy was perceived to be less passive and more committed.

"Can you imagine how I felt when I had to watch them cuddle AND claim that it was great that the two of them got together? I really, really liked her you know..." FJ's voice was choked with emotion. The man who controlled the accounts of bigwig clients in an international bank was at his weakest and most vulnerable.

Well FJ, if you really liked her, why didn't you tell her? You had nothing to lose but your own pride then...Now, you lost the Golden Ticket. Well, hope you'll bounce back soon. Learn something from this and move on. Let this be a lesson to all the passive guys out there...

Meeting Stefan for dinner on Tues...looking forward to that.

Not a great day...Even though today was my off day...

Was awakened by a call from Desche...Some incoherent apologies and explanations...but the gist of the message was that he can't club with us tonight...I mumbled, "it's ok.." and flopped back into my pillow.

Continued sleeping till nine...woke up and had instant noodles and 3-in-1 coffee for breakfast...Flipped through the papers and was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of election coverage...Watched Scooby Doo on cartoon network and then fell asleep on the couch.

At around ten, I woke up to check some emails...Received a mail from Adrian, the guy in charge of the SMU expedition. Apparently, a group of students from SMU are going on a bike expedition across France to promote this new concept called " Adventure Learning"...Megs approached me and asked me if I could get Funkygrad to be the official media partner...Stefan and I thought this was cool, so we agreed...I spent most of the morning working out the details of our contract and arranging for a follow-up meeting.

After the Attica debacle, I have become more selective of the stuff that we choose to cover...I do not want a repeat of the same incident...the embarassment...the disappointment...the mismatched expectations...*yucks*.

Went to the library in the afternoon and bumped into Kev...he was on his way to the airport...Turns out my clique was going to Bangkok for the weekend...and nobody told me.

Went home...had to cancel a date with J. because something cropped up at the last minute. No alternative date was fixed.

Kinda disappointed with last night's event...

Went really early to stake out the place and check out the pre-event prep...Sad to say, there was no pre-event prep...10 min to the party, the place was still empty...The photog was getting restless and randomly snapping some shots of the dance floor and the DJs...The organisers were apologising profusely and were explaining the big screw-up...I was TRYING to sound understanding...and telling them not to worry.

Pity though...it was touted to be the greatest post-exam bash ever...the promo poster looked really psychedelic and retro...and the venue was top-notch and hip...but there were only sixteen people at the party...The sponsors pulled out and the programme was scrapped...what was left were surly, sulky guests and bored service crew...Geez...come to think of it, there were more waiters than party guests...

Left early after an extremely unfruitful evening...went to Liang Court 7-11 to grab a coke before heading home...

I am feeling extremely stressed now.

Went for the BAL exam yesterday@ NUS...Topic was the conflict between privacy( as a fundamental right) and the need to protect the sexual privacy of society-at-large...Apparently, some foreign tourists had recently witnessed a weirdo sunbathing nude in an area with public access...The moral sensitivities of the tourists were offended...this led to a police report and a subsequent conviction...blah blah blah

Anyway, this blog post is not about the BAL...it's about what happened immediately after the BAL...Some Law Seniors invited the freshies to a post-exam bash at Attica Too...Being the kaypoh that I am, I offered to cover the event and post it on the funkygrad webbie...Stefan said Ok...so I proceeded to source for a photog, arrange for free party passes and compile the event details...worse, I promised the Events people free pre-party publicity and coverage of the post-party VIP afterparty ( don't let the semantics confuse you, this is just a chillout session at the VIP area.)

One big glitch...the party has NO FIXED PROGRAMME! SHIT! What am I going to write about? After I told Stefan...things started getting ugly...he told me not to bother with this event as it would be a waste of my effort...However, I already arranged for the photog and event coverage crew! How now?

I'm sorry Stefan...Really in quite a fix now...if there is nothing to write about, I'm screwed...and the Marketing people are not answering my calls...

Oh, by the way, check out my new post...

http://www.funkygrad.com/campus/displayarticle.php?artID=704&subcat=rave